100 Acts of Kindness 2019

In January, I committed to doing 100 acts of kindness this year. I dedicated Tuesday's Tips and Tricks to Acts of Kindness suggestions. It took me a whole month to get started, but on January 31, I made the choice to add the first act to my "completed" list. This brought me so much joy that I began to eagerly look for opportunities to perform acts of kindness and also to plan ways to add to my "completed" list.

Giving in to my natural tendency to think positive, I started my "Completed" list here back in January, believing that it would be a list 100 items long by December 31. Some acts, like praising a child to their parents so that the child can overhear, had such a great response and brought me so much joy that I tried to make it a habit. I learned that people need and appreciate encouragement and encouragement is easy to give if I only make the smallest effort to  look for opportunities to lift others up.

Other things, like collecting items for an animal shelter, having bags on hand to give to homeless/hungry folks and baking for my neighbors and co workers fell flat. Good intentions, but not very good follow thru. I really did have good intentions. 

My list didn't quite make 100. In complete transparency, while I did complete most, I did not complete every thing on the list below. Still, I like the list. I think it's full of good ideas and I think I'll try to complete it in 2020. Maybe I can even make it to 100. Maybe doing some things more than once... I suppose if its my list I can make the rules. We'll see how it turns out in 2020.

That being Said, here's my list

1. Put a surprise note in loved ones’ lunch, bookbag, car, etc.
2. Make care packages for homeless people and give them out.
3. Bake cookies for the office
4. Make breakfast for the office
5. Stop at a kid’s lemonade stand and buy a drink
6. Leave a 100% tip
7. Donate a small sum of $$ to a charity
8. Tweet or FB a genuine compliment to 3 people
9. Complement a parent on how well-behaved their child is
10. Cook a meal or do laundry for a friend who just had surgery
11. Donate an old piece of clothing when you get a new one
12. Write an old teacher to let them know they made a difference in your life
13. Compliment someone to their boss
14. Write someone a letter – on paper – and mail it
15. Give someone a book you think they’d like
16. Bring fun office supplies to liven up the the workday
17. Sincerely compliment your boss
18. Put a sticky note with a positive message on the restroom mirror
19. Compliment someone in front of others
20. Compliment your child in front of others.
21. Compliment your spouse in front of others
22. Frame a friend’s favorite quote and give it to them
23. Take baked goods to your neighbors
24. Compliment a stranger
25. Praise a child to their parents where the child can hear it
26. Give Chocolate
27. Bake a cake for the birthday person
28. Take coloring books and crayons to the pediatric wing
29. Send a thank you note to the police station and Fire station
30. Bake cookies and take them to the fire station and police station
31. Leave compliments on sticky notes
32. Leave a note on a public bathroom mirror that says “You’re Beautiful”
33. Write a letter or send a card to a child who could use some extra attention
34. Send a card to a friend
35. Leave money in the vending machine for someone
36. Give kid’s valentines cards to people in your office
37. “Here’s $20 for the next person in line” at the grocery
38.  Leave a positive sticky note on someone’s desk.
39.  Tell your boss how much you like working for them and why
40. Tell people how much you've learned from them
41. Tell people what you appreciate about them
42. Share overheard compliments
43. Check in with friends who have lost their mom or dad on Mothers/Fathers day
44. Cut out an article and share it with someone "I thought about you when I saw this"
45. Make a prayer book for someone. Record your prayers for them for a year.
46.  Check in with someone
47.  Buy food for a homeless person
48.  Involve your kids in community service
49. watch for pet food sales and donate to a local shelter
50. collect newspaper and used towels for an animal shelter

100 things - 2019

Each year I struggle to complete my list of 100 things. Today is January 1 2019. I HOPE  that creating a “100 things” page will help me record “things”all year so that I do not have to struggle to remember things in December!! It is my hope that my 2019 list will be more filled with personal things. Of course I will still record famous deaths, political events, national news, etc. Also... maybe this will keep things in something close to chronological order.

We’ll see.

Here goes...

1. Verse - James 1:2 - Consider it pure joy my brothers when you face trials of many kinds
2. Word - Joy
3. Goal - read 52 books 
4. Started working for David Hughes January 1. 
5. A student from Kentucky made the news when he was on a school trip to Washington for the pro life rally. The liberal media took one snippet of a video that made it appear that the student was harassing a native american protester while wearing a "Make America Great Again" cap. In reality, the students had been harassed by the Black Hebrew Israelites and the Native American was known for causing conflict at such gatherings. This whole mess shone light on the importance of getting "the rest of the story", introduced the Black Hebrew Israelites to mainstream culture, and revealed (again) the biased nature of the liberal media.
6. Arctic Blast! In the last days of January, the temps in the mid west dipped to -30 with a wind chill of NEGATIVE 65 Degrees in parts of Minnesota! Schools and businesses were closed for several days due to the dangerously cold temps.
7. Also in January, New York passed a bill/law/whatever that made abortion legal up to the time of birth. Virginia presented the same to its legislature and it was not passed. 
8. Mom turned 68 
9. After Collide (First weekend in February), Izzy told me she wants to write a devotional with me. We enlisted some of her friends (Anna Mical, Bryanna. Haylee and Graci Lou) and their moms (Shelly, Christie, and Lindsey) to write a devotional for moms and daughters. The idea is to address things moms and daughters typically disagree on. The format will be "I say".... "Mom Says"... "God says."  At least that's the plan so far.
10. Heaven's Gates / Hell's Flames - February 10-12
11. Second US-North Korea summit
12. Intermittent Fasting
13. Dr. Jason Fung
14. The Dectives Dinner Theater at PBC in March was a huge success. I was super excited to get to do the centerpieces for the tables and bake the desserts.
15. Luke Perry Died after a stroke
16. New Zealand terrorist attack kills 50 and injures 50 more
17. Mueller report = No Russian Collusion
18. A Star is Born
19. Enneagram - Type 4
20. Mrs Pat Reeves died
21. Rise against Hunger 
22. City Wide Easter Egg hunt moved to Center City
23. Paul Lacoste Boot Camp
24. Cathedral at Notre Dame burned
25. Sri Lanka Easter Bombing targeting Christians - killed over 300 and wounded over 500 more
26. Bird Box
27. Migrant Caravan
28. Record cold (-32) in the northern US
29. Luke Perry Died after having a stroke.
30. AOC (Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez)
31. Bernie Sanders Socialism
32. March Tornado killed 23 in Alabama and Georgia
33. Brian and Tayler postponed wedding
34. volleyball
35. Finally Read Harry Potter Series
36. Google had a payroll audit and discovered that they are underpaying MEN!
37. Stacy Parker - Treatment
38. Sherry Overby left the bank to do HR at Belhaven
39. Katie Warren left the bank to do HR at State Bank
40. Intermittent Fasting
41. 15 year anniversary at the bank
42. Brian turns 20
43. 22 wedding anniversary
44. Tayler started working for Citizens State Bank
45. Dat Dog
46. Magazine St. NOLA
47. Brian and Tayler broke up
48. Fire at Notre Dame
49. over 200 killed in Easter Terrorist attack in Sri Lanka
50. Hillary Clinton and Obama refer to the Sri Lanka attack as an attack on "Easter Worshipers" instead of and attack on Christians.
51. Measles
52. Greatest Showman is now one of my fave movies
53. Marvel Avengers End Game
54. Laura - TWINS!!!!
55. New Therapist - Stephanie Smith Jefferson
56. Tayler got her own apartment
57. Brian's first Spring Break w Mission Lab
58. Spartan Ink
59. sold 2 abstracts to Jason in Florida
60. Paul Lacoste Summer Training
61. Lender Approval verification
62. EKG/Exercise Induced Asthma
63. Completed Paul Lacoste Sports Summer Training
64. 13 Minute Mile
65. Finished Vampire Diaries
66. Shellie and Bill moved downstairs at the bank
67. James Epstien "suicide"
68. Greg Moore left Community Bank
69. I left Community Bank
70. Started my career at Renasant Bank
71. Trump impeachment mess
72. Tried Indian cuisine and loved it
73. Met Allison Johnson
74. Started leading paint classes at Market House DIY
75. Painted our Sunday school room
76. Realized my purpose in teaching the college kids Sunday school... preparing them to serve
77. Reconnected w Lori Styron
78. Sold a painting for 100 at a craft show
79. Discovered artist Chuck Black
80. Obsessed with painting sunsets and water
81.  Brian moved home
82.  new couch and love seat
83. trump impeachment fiasco
84. Timmy Mclendon leads worship
85. Starliner failure - wrong orbit
86. Frozen 2
87. Black List
88. Drew Brees breaks record for completed touchdown passes (541)
89. Rose Ray Died
90. Christopher and Jennifer Thompson  - son - Leroy
91. actually enneagram 9 - maybe - 
92. new job - good stress
93. North Korea threatens to bomb us on Christmas
94. Spent time with Mrs P on Christmas Eve
95.  No Christmas Tree
96.  Very few gifts
97. Christmas Eve Waffle House, then Phase 10 w iz
98. Steak and Ribs Christmas day
99. Read 52 books
100. Wrestled with the questions, "What does Christmas feel like?" "How many of those feelings have something to do with Jesus?"

Monday Motivation

 How does unforgiveness make us FEEL? Angry, bitter, ill... it makes me feel... ugly. I don't know how else to describe it. I feel full of hate. I feel mean.  Now, if Satan's only goal is to steal, kill, and destroy and Jesus came to give us life and give it abundantly... who do you think is in control when we are eaten up with unforgiveness?  Satan is also the Father of Lies and I KNOW all too well the lie he tells when it comes to forgivness. It may sound familiar to you too...

"If you forgive them, you are letting them off the hook."
"If you forgive them, you are saying that what they did was okay."
"If you forgive them, they won't realize how much they hurt you."

I dealt with this extensively years ago. Worst time in my life. I'm sure i wrote about it on here somewhere. My favorite thought from that time was this...

"Unforgiveness is like drinking poison expecting it to kill the other person."

Sounds JUST like something Satan would want us to do, doesn't it?

Thursday's Thought on... not happily ever after

Now I don't know about you, but I like stories that have happy endings. Good guy ends up with good girl, bad guy gets justice for his rotten behavior... happily ever after and all that stuff. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy that mid-story plot twist that brings in an added element of drama as much as the next gal, but in the end, what I want is "and they lived happily ever after."

In case you didn't know, there are a TON of movies that have terrible endings. There are tons of books that don't have happy endings.  You may be surprised to find out that not all the stories in the Bible end with "and they all lived happily ever after." You would think that, of all the things we could read, the Bible would be full of happy endings.

While the big picture of the Bible (the revelation of God and restoration of Man) totally has a happy ending, the stories that make up that bigger story aren't all hearts, flowers, and happily ever afters. For example, Bathsheba and Tamar have TRAGIC stories. Their lives cause me serious anxiety because... well, I like hope. I find comfort in knowing that God is FOR me, that He SEES my hurt and He will MAKE IT RIGHT.

Thing is, life just isn't always like that.  Right? Are you nodding along with me yet? Cancer doesn't always go into remission. People don't love you back. People leave. People lie. The bad guys don't always get caught. We lose jobs. We lose children. Our hearts ache and our palms sweat and our stomachs knot and, honestly, sometimes, no matter how hard we try, things don't work out in the end.

Such seems to be the case for Bathsheba and Tamar. They suffered more pain at the hands of men than I care to think about.  Go ahead and read their stories here and here. I'll wait.

Goodness, those ladies did not get anything close to a happily ever after.... at least not by my definition. When I read their stories, I am BROKEN. How could a God who loves us allow such things? (and we all know that this kind of horror still happens every day) Before you get upset and decide that God is 'wrong", let's look at something... 'cause this is one of those situations where "God's ways are not our ways." Even without a "happily ever after,"  these ladies got more justice than you or I could have EVER handed out or ever dreamed up and delivered!

While it may not have seemed like it at the time, it is quite obvious that God Almighty saw what was done to Bathsheba and He did make it right. In Matthew 1, where we are given the lineage of Jesus, check out verse 6 here. Do you SEE that???? I've heard it before, but a Ladies Small group lesson recently highlighted, bolded, and italicized it for me. God calls David out... right there for all eternity. "Bathsheba was URIAH's wife." Wow. Not only is her story recorded so that forever and ever we know that her fate was David's doing and not her own, God notes her true place... as Uriah's wife.

And what about Tamar? Her story is recorded as well. Anyone who reads Tamar's story sees her innocence. Even though the men in her life failed her miserably,  her story is recorded for all time. the evil Amnon did to her is recorded and the injustice she suffered as a result is recorded as well. It is as though God wanted to make sure that her side of the story was told.

Maybe these stories needed to be told for Bathsheba's and Tamar's sake. Maybe they needed to be told for you and for me...

Maybe we need to be reminded that life doesn't always have happy endings, but that doesn't negate the ultimate happy ending we will have when we meet Christ in heaven and spend eternity there.
Maybe need to be reminded that GOD sees the truth and is very present in our lives even when we feel like He is far from us.
Maybe we need to be reminded that God's ways are not ours and His justice is perfect and better than anything we could dream up... we just have to trust Him.

Just my thoughts,
K

Thursday Thoughts on... fear

Several weeks ago I shared that I have a very real fear of failure. While writing that post, I realized (and shared) that "success" was not something I considered to be an option. When considering possible outcomes to any given situation, my goal was to fail in the least painful way. This realization gave me hope. 

Maybe I fail because I choose to... and maybe if I choose to succeed, I will.

Around this same time, a dear friend approached me about buying into her online business. The business has been very good to her. VERY good. Like, "she just quit her regular job to do this full time" good. I was just on the verge of agreeing to join her, when someone pointed out that I'd never put that much effort into marketing my art... and that if I did, I might be just as successful.

With all this in mind I committed to give painting 100%.  For me, right now, this comes in the form of doing "Paint With Me by Southern Breezes" classes/parties. You know the drill... I walk you through a painting and when we are done, you have a work of art all your own. 

I have shamelessly marketed weekly classes on social media. I have shamelessly asked people to come to a class (only when I think their completed painting would make them happy).  The whole process has been more uncomfortable than I can express. 

I woke up Sunday morning with only 2 people signed up for this week's class. I was SICK. I almost canceled it. I REALLY considered just calling it quits all together, but then reminded myself that I was gonna give 100% until the end of the year... just to test this "I fail because I quit before I have a chance to succeed" theory. I prepared myself to make the best out of a 2 person class. I made the conscious decision to follow through, to NOT quit, to not chicken out... to just follow the plan... this week that simply meant hosting a paint class with 2 people. 

Would you believe that by Tuesday morning I had NINE people signed up for this week's class??? I kept getting messages and emails that read something like "is there still room in this class? can you please fit me in?" and "I know I missed the deadline, but could you let me know if you have a cancellation?" and "I forgot to message you earlier, can I still come to the class tonight?"

Y'all... my poor little defeated heart SOARED! 

I know that sometimes we have to cut our losses and get out of something that isn't beneficial. However, let's not confuse "this isn't beneficial to me" with "I'm scared I'll fail."  Failure is not fatal and we won't know if we can succeed unless we try...REALLY try.

Just my thoughts..

K

Thursday's Thoughts on... the luxury of being too busy to write

When I don't write, one of 2 things has happened... I've gotten really depressed or I've gotten really busy.

I've been really busy these past few weeks.... and I haven't written... because I have the option to write or not write. No one is gonna be upset with me if I don't post something here every Thursday. I'm not sure anyone would even notice... which is a good thing... I think.

I was thinking about this on Sunday morning as the hubs got up to preach and it hit me... he CAN'T have a week where he just doesn't "feel it." He can't have a week that he doesn't seek a message from God... cause, ya know... that's kind of his job.

Of course, I am tempted to add a little "but it IS his job and he can work on his sermon all day for 5 days at work," and I SUPPOSE this may seem true for anyone who isn't in the ministry... but for those of us who are, we know that "Sermon Prep time" is not honored by the typical church member.... or anyone else except other preachers... and maybe not even with them. 

Not only that... but honestly, on weeks when I have nothing to say, it wouldn't matter if I sat at the key board for 27 hours straight... the screen is still gonna be blank. So on weeks when I have nothing to say... i say nothing.

A preacher does not have that option. He doesn't have the option to skip a week. He doesn't have the option to be too tired or depressed or stressed out to write a sermon. He doesn't have the option to be "too busy" to write a sermon. 

I've been married to "the Preacher" for almost 23 years.  I sit on the pew every week like most of you and totally take the sermon for granted. Today I am amazed that he is able to prepare a sermon week after week, no matter what life is throwing at our church, our family or him personally. 

Makes me respect him a bit more and appreciate him a lot more. I hope these thoughts help you see the effort and sacrifice behind YOUR pastor's sermons... and will encourage you to let him know that you appreciate what he does to deliver God's Word to you each week.

Just my thoughts,

K

Get Fit Friday

This Week's Goal: Do I even have goals anymore? LOL

Did I meet it? I have no idea.

Biggest Accomplishment: I DID get in the gym and I DID IF 16 hours or more 4 days this week

I'm feeling... energized, excited, hopeful, READY FOR COOLER WEATHER

Next week's Goal:  IF 16 hours or more 4 days, 1 24 hour fast, in the gym 4 days

It's Important to me because: I don't want to lose the benefits I gained from PLS training

What I need to succeed: Baby steps. Just keep going and don't give up. Focus on the process and let the results come when they come.

Get Fit Friday

I took last week to share what I've learned about Diastasis Recti. Now, back to my plans...

I've said over and over again that I MUST get control over my diet. A couple of weeks ago I mentioned that I have friends who can just make the decision to stop eating sugar and do it. I also mentioned that I WANT that level of control over my body.

I don't have it.

(big surprise)

My sweet friend Olivia had a fabulous idea... Just limit my junk food. I mean, IF I'm not able to abstain all together.  I so totally overthink everything, and I recognize this, so I'm trying very hard to keep this simple.

So here's the (simple) plan...

• Eat out only once a week (because we almost always go out with friends after church on Sundays). This will eliminate most unhealthy meal temptations.
• Limit myself to maximum of  3 unhealthy snacks a week. (I know this is totally a mind game, but knowing I have the option will make me feel better)
• Drink 80 oz of water a day.

Next week I will share my work outs. I hope that now that I have a plan in place I can just relax and follow that plan  instead of constantly changing my plan when I don't see results as soon as I'd like.

Get Fit Friday - Diastasis Recti

After last week's post, several of you inquired about Diastasis Recti, mostly "Kris, what are you talking about"

Diastasis Recti is a condition in which the large muscles in the abdomen separate. Many women experience this when they are pregnant. Most times it heals itself, but sometimes (as in my case) it does not. Men who carry a significantly large amount of weight around their belly can develop it as well.

D.R. is most noticeable when the abdominal muscles are tense, like when you are doing a sit up, coughing, etc. It looks like a bulge (I thought mine was a hernia).  Here is visual for ya. Yu can see that the separation can be around the belly button, or above or below it. Mine is almost exactly like that last image and I started working on it because I realized that my belly won't be flat until I fix it.

If you want to determine whether or not you have D.R. or want to determine how significant yours is, here is a simple self-test that will help you determine if you have diastasis recti.

• Lie on your back with your knees bent, and the soles of your feet on the floor.
• Place one hand behind your head, and the other hand on your abdomen, with your fingertips across your midline, parallel with your waistline, at the level of your belly button.
• With your abdominal wall relaxed, gently press your fingertips into your abdomen.
• Roll your upper body off the floor into a “crunch,” making sure that your ribcage moves closer to your pelvis.
• Move your fingertips back and forth across your midline, feeling for the right and left sides of your rectus abdominis muscle. Test for separation at, above, and below your belly button.

Signs of Diastasis Recti/Abdominal Separation

• A gap of more than 2 1/2 finger-widths when the rectus abdominis is fully contracted.
• The gap does not shrink as you contract your abdominal wall.
• You can see a small mound protruding along the length of you midline.

Now then... IF you determine that you have D.R. there are exercises you can do to fix it! (yay!!!) I talked to one of the PLS Coaches about this and she gave me a list. (You can search YouTube for them if they are not familiar.) One thing she stressed was "belly button to spine"- keeping the abs tight and pulled in as well as keeping your back flat to the floor if you are doing the exercises that require you to lie on your back. Here's the list:

• Pelvic Tilts
• Heel Drops
• Heel slides
• Glute Bridge March
• Bird Dog
• Side Plank
• single leg lifts
• squats 
• Wall Sits

I'm doing these nightly for these 12 weeks. I started out with a 3 finger width D.R. and am very interested to see how it shrinks in 12 weeks.

Thursday thoughts on ... Marty Sampson

I don't even know where to begin.

I don't want to spread rumor and I don't want to get caught up in drama. I'm not trying to spark debate. I really don't want to debate it at all.

Still, this is a big deal and is weighing heavy on my heart.

This week, Marty Sampson announced on Instagram that he is "losing his faith." The Instagram post was later taken down and he clarified that he isn't renouncing his faith, but that his faith "is on very shaky ground." You can read an article and the Instagram post here.

This may not mean anything to you. That's okay. It has me sideways and I am trying to work through the fall out. So here we are.

Marty Sampson is a contemporary worship music singer and songwriter. He lead worship at Hillsong Church in Australia. He was one of the original members of Hillsong United. Between the years of 1999 and 2018, he wrote or co-wrote almost 100 worship songs, many of which have become staples in contemporary worship services around the world.

This week, he said he "isn't buying in;" that Christianity "is just like other religions."

This is the part that broke me...

“I’m genuinely losing my faith, and it doesn’t bother me. Like, what bothers me now is nothing. I am so happy now, so at peace with the world. It’s crazy.”

How can someone who KNOWS who God is think that losing his faith is okay? How can it NOT bother him? How can someone who loves Jesus be happy and at peace without Him?

The only explanation I can come up with is that he didn't know God, he didn't love Jesus... instead, he worshiped the watered down, warm and fuzzy version of God that we have adopted through much of our contemporary worship music.

Before you misunderstand me... I am NOT saying that ALL contemporary Christian music presents a faulty image of God. Only some of it. Wolves in sheep's clothing, false teachers, ear ticklers and all that. 

There has been a running argument/discussion/debate at my house recently about "worship music" that doesn't mention God, Jesus, or the Holy Spirit as well as "worship music" that depicts an image or quality of God that contradicts Scripture. This announcement by Sampson brought it all to a climax.

This is what happens when we worship an image of God that isn't Biblical.

John Cooper (lead singer for Skillet) released an amazing response to Marty Sampson's announcement. You can read it here.  Please take a moment to read it. This article is full of thought provoking info, but this is the line from the article that stopped me in my tracks...

"Have you ever considered the disrespect of singing songs to God that are untrue of His character?"

We have, over time, watered down the Gospel so that no one is offended or left out. (God understands and looks the other way when you choose to sin. You don't need to change anything, just walk the aisle and get baptized and you get to go to heaven.) We have used emotion driven worship songs to create an image of God that more resembles a father character on our favorite family sit-com than the God of the Bible because it makes us feel good and meets our need for emotional (human) attachment.

Where has this left us?

One of the greatest influencers in modern day Christian worship music has decided that he isn't "buying in" to the Christian faith any more.

This whole thing also brings to light the sad but real truth that many times we worship pastors and worship leaders and Christian leaders instead of God.  If we are worshiping anything other that GOD, our FAITH can be shaken when things like this happen. We can be swayed by someone's fall. However, when we worship the God of the Bible, our faith is strong and unshakable. I'm thankful for this. While I am upset and saddened about this whole thing, my personal faith is not affected by it in the least.

It does make me consider how I teach, what we sing in church, and what we focus on when putting together our worship service. 

This HAS caused me to rethink my personal image of God. 

We must see God for who HE says He is. We must worship God for who HE says He is.  Any other image of God leaves us on shaky ground. Anything less than the God of the Bible is not worthy of our devotion. Only the God of the Bible is capable of  saving souls and radically changing lives.

God IS love. Jesus DID dine with sinners. Jesus DID suffer, die, and rise from the grave to seal a place in heaven for any and all who believe in Him and follow Him. We serve a loving, merciful, gracious God. We serve a God who is an endlessly imaginative Creator. The God we serve knit each of us together, knows the number of hairs on our heads and knows our deepest desires and most intimate thoughts. The Jesus we follow cast out demons, healed incurable diseases, and raised people from the dead. We serve a God who wept.  We also serve the God that parted the Red Sea, closed the mouths of lions, wiped out all of humanity, save one family, with a flood, turned a woman into a pillar of salt because she disobeyed, put Jonah in the belly of fish because he disobeyed, cast 1/3 of the angels from heaven because of their rebellion,  and banished Adam and Eve from the paradise He created for them because of their sin.

The God of the Bible IS love....but he is also all powerful. 

When anyone in Scripture met Jesus, their entire life was radically changed. When anyone in scripture met GOD, they either fell dead (literally) or at the very least fell on their face out of fear... they didn't crawl into his lap, lean on His chest, give Him a hug or high five Him.

Much of what drives us to worship is something other than God... maybe it's love, acceptance, belonging, peace, or any of the other gifts God gives us...maybe we worship the ways God has blessed us...maybe we worship His promises or the fact that He rescued us from hell.... but that's not the same as worshiping GOD because He is God. When our worship is influenced because of the type of music played, the lighting in the room, or who is leading worship... when we spend more time constructing the right atmosphere for worship than we spend in God's Word preparing our hearts for worship... I think we need to stop and consider what exactly it is that we are worshiping.

Maybe we worship... worship.

Maybe we have grown to love the FEELING of worship so much that we worship Worship instead of  God. 


I'll visit this again. I'm just starting to sort it out in my head... and already my stance on this whole thing is very different than it was only a few short weeks ago.


Just my thoughts...
K

Get Fit Friday

This Week's Goal: Determine 5 ways to measure progress for the next 12 weeks and make a plan to improve those things in that time. Make a plan to work the processed foods out of my diet and be eating clean in 12 weeks. 

Did I meet it? yes
60 second squat: 30 lbs 30 reps
60 second lunges: 30 lbs 18 reps
60 second push up: 4
Wall Sit: 1:20
Plank: 1:05
Mile: 13:01
Diastasis Recti: 3

1 rep max:
Leg Press: 250 lbs
Chest Press: 70 lbs
Compound Row: 105 lbs
Lat Pull-down: 110 lbs

I'll measure these again the first week of November. I'll record my basic workouts over the next few weeks.

The only way I know to get the processed foods out of my diet is to do it. My friend Laura says "The only way to slay the sugar dragon is to starve it." In other words... the only way to curb sugar cravings is to stop eating sugar. While I would love to say I am going to do this cold turkey, I have not sold myself on it yet. There are people i my life who have such control that they can do whatever they decide to do. I want to be able to just stop eating sugar. Is that possible????

Biggest Accomplishment: getting in the gym 5 times without the "requirement" set by PLS training. Deciding for myself what I want to improve over the next 12 weeks and formulating a plan to do it.

I'm feeling... pretty peaceful overall. I feel growth in several areas and growth is a bit uncomfortable, but all in all, it's good.

Next week's Goal: 3 MORNINGS in the gym; 60 oz water daily

It's Important to me because: I can't seem to be consistent with my water intake and I KNOW I will feel better if I am properly hydrated. Morning workouts feel good. It gets me up and going.

What I need to succeed: Stop looking for results. Just follow the plan.

Thursday's Thoughts on... measuring success

If you've been reading my ramblings lately, you know that I just finished 12 weeks of exercise "training". Last week I mentioned the following...

"I'm not sure I have ever been part of another group where not one person thought that they would benefit from someone else's failure nor would they suffer from someone else's success. It was refreshing."

I've been rolling this thought around in my head for a week now.

It was understood and expected that some of us were weaker than others. It was OBVIOUS  -some run a mile in less that 7 minutes while others run it in 15. Those who were slower were not criticized or condemned or judged... it was understood that they just were not as physically fit as others...not yet anyway. Everyone wanted everyone else to do their best. We all wanted everyone to succeed.

I ran my final mile in 13 minutes. The fact that others ran a mile in half that time in NO way took away from my success or from the JOY I felt in taking 3 minutes off my original mile.

Let me say this again....

"I'm not sure I have ever been part of another group where not one person thought that they would benefit from someone else's failure nor would they suffer from someone else's success. It was refreshing."

I wonder what the rest of my life would look like if I had this same attitude about everything I do.

Think about it.

Is your view of success/failure based on whether or not you are better/worse than someone else? We do this in so many areas. We put our gifts and talents up against others who don't even have the same gifts and talents as we do. What is that saying... "If you measure success by one's ability to climb a tree, a fish will always feel like a failure" ... yeah, something like that.

This is especially dangerous when considering our spiritual life. Where I am with God is where I am with God.  I am God's child because of the sacrifice Christ made for me. Nothing more. Nothing less. We so often measure our success or failure as a disciple/minister/Christian compared to what others are doing...when we were not called to carry out their calling, nor were they called to carry out ours.

What would our spiritual lives look like if we did not believe that our level of success or failure as a disciple was lessened by the success of, or heightened by the failure of, someone else?  What would that FEEL like? Refreshing? Encouraging? Would we feel empowered? Maybe even victorious?  I know this: Comparing myself to others leaves me feeling like a complete and utter failure.

If we understood and accepted the obvious truth... that we simply are not all in the same place in our spiritual walk.. how would we treat those who struggle? At the same time, would we be more likely to reach out for and accept help and encouragement from others?

Another image burned in my heart from training gives me a visual of this very thing. Those who finished first came back and ran in with those of us who were struggling...but that's a post for another day.

Much love and big big hugs!
K

Monday Motivation

Over the past 3 weeks, I have been spending much more time with God. I've been studying God's word, surrounding myself with Praise and Worship music and spending time in prayer. 

It makes a difference.

There are so many things that I have turned to in hopes of finding joy again and, while these things may offer a temporary reprieve from the pain in my heart, they are, indeed only temporary.

Life with Christ offers full and complete joy, but only to those completely surrendered to Him.

I wonder, if we believed this, would we be divided on our worship? If we believed that being in Christ's presence would fill up all our empty places...would we ever want to do anything apart from Him???

Makes me wonder if we really believe this to be true. 

What would our lives look like if we did?

Get Fit Friday

So I did it. PLS Summer session is done!
As I promised yesterday, here are the results of today's fit test:

I also lost the following inches...

Calf:1.8

Thigh: 4

Hips: 5.5

Waist: 4.5

Chest: 5

Bicep: 1.5

Forearm: .75

When I started my run this morning, I told April that I wanted to finish in 13 minutes... that's 3 minutes off my original time. I did it! I'm sooo proud of myself! 

I am also surprised at how much stronger I am than I was 12 weeks ago. I remember STRUGGLING to complete the first fit test. Today it wasn't easy, but it wasn't horrid either... even with heavier weights.

I didn't pay attention to the beginning weight reported the first day of training, but based on my own recording when I first started this journey in May, I lost 16 pounds.

More importantly, I met some fantastic people and made some really good friends. Its amazing how well people can bond over 5am workouts. The thing that means the most to me is how those who were more physically fit then me encouraged those of us who struggled more. There was no competition. We all wanted everyone to succeed. Im not sure I have ever been part of another group where not one person thought that they would benefit from someone else's failure nor would they suffer from someone else's success. It was refreshing.

I connected with people and realize now that I really know very little about them. This gave me a wonderful mage of how people can bond over one common thing... but that is a post for another day...

Most importantly,  I learned that I can succeed. (See yesterday's post to learn more about that.) I did this. I did it! I really really did it! I have a long way to go. I'm not satisfied with where I am now, but I am PLEASED with the result of the work I put in these past 12 weeks.

I actually believe that I CAN trust the process and I have a better grasp of realistic expectations concerning what can be accomplished in 12 weeks. 

 I'm sooo glad I did this. So very glad.

What's Next: Spend the next 12 weeks focusing on getting stronger and cleaning up my diet. Going to pick a few measurable things (other than weight and inches) to use as a gauge for progress. I'm thinking push-up, squat, plank, timed mile, pull up? Maybe other things? Different things?  So far as cleaning up my diet... in a perfect world I'd only eat whole foods and never crave processed foods again. While I KNOW that a whole food diet is the best for me and that processed foods make me feel bad... It's HARD. Anyway, I'm gonna work on it. 

Next week's Goal: Determine 5 ways to measure progress for the next 12 weeks and make a plan to improve those things in that time. Make a plan to work the processed foods out of my diet and be eating clean in 12 weeks. 

It's Important to me because: I can do this. I want to be stronger and more healthy.

What I need to succeed: keep going

Thursday Thoughts on... my fear of failure

Over the past 3 months I've shared a lot about going to the gym and what not. Today was the last day of  PLS Summer Training. I'll write about the physical results tomorrow but today I want to share something that goes a bit deeper than inches or pounds.

Honestly, I considered QUITTING... NOW... here at the very end... I want to QUIT. It started 3 weeks ago and the feeling has gotten progressively stronger...

This morning I realized why... and it is quite interesting...to me at least.

To put it simply, I'm afraid.

I'm afraid that, at the end of this, my results will not be what the people around me expect and... I will have failed. It is easier to quit... and fail by choice... than to try and fail anyway.

This brought to mind a conversation I had with Mom over the weekend. She told me (again) I should pursue painting and told me (again) that I should write a book. She asked (again) why I don't and I told her "I'm afraid." We talked about this for a long time. Bottom line is, just like with the gym, I am afraid to fail.

I'd rather NOT do something and fail by choice than really try and hope to succeed and still fail.

Goodness...  I've had this same conversation with myself before.

Here's the thing that I realized yesterday, the thing that's different and that prompted me to write about it today:

There is no option to succeed. 

In my mind, in my heart, in the deep places where the real, raw, and brutally honest part of me lives, I believe that my only options are to try and fail or to quit and fail by choice... there is no option to succeed. 

So...what if I consider success as an option?

What would my life look like if I strive for success instead of striving for the least painful way to fail?

What would change if my life wasn't ruled by fear of failure?

What would change if I didn't make decisions based on what I believe will disappoint the people I love the least?

I wonder what my life would look like if I didn't spend energy looking for logical, believable, acceptable reasons to justify self-imposed failure and instead spent that energy honestly striving for success.

I recognize that this fear of failure has stolen so much from me. It brings to mind John 10:10, where Jesus tells us, "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full."

Is fear the tool that Satan has used to steal, kill, and destroy in my life?

I'll close with a few more verses... for the day when I look back on this and need to be reminded... and for you, if you need it today.

For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.
—2 Timothy 1:7

When I am afraid, I will trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I will not be afraid. What can mortal man do to me? - Psalm 56:3-4



Much love and Big Big hugs!!!!!
K

Tuesday Tips and tricks - BEat the Heat

 


Plan indoor activities for the hottest days...

• Go to the movies
• Visit a museum
• Learn a new craft
• decorate cookies or cupcakes

Water is most always a good idea, just be sure to wear sunscreen:

• Go swimming
• play in the sprinkler
• wash the car
• visit a splash pad
• go to a water park

Tuesday Tips and Tricks- Beat the Heat

1. Frozen hand towels or wash cloths. Great for Soccer and baseball games. Drape it around your (or your little one's) neck for almost instant cooling.

2. Pupcicle: Fill a bucket with water and chicken broth and lots of dog treats. Freeze until it turns to ice. turn the bucket over and put the frozen goodness on a plate or stand for the pups to enjoy.

3. Frozen fruit. I especially like frozen grapes.

4. Choose cotton clothing.

5. Put your sheets in the freezer for 30 minutes before you go to bed.

Get Fit Friday

This Week's Goal: Be REALISTIC; 6 workouts, 80 oz water, take lunch to work

Did I meet it? I DO think that I was very realistic with my goals. 80 Oz of water a day is still a challenge. So is bringing my lunch.  I just need to plan better. Killed my workouts. went to the gym Friday and Saturday mornings, Monday Morning and Monday night, Tuesday morning and Tuesday night, Wednesday morning,  That's 7 workouts!

Biggest Accomplishment: Not quitting.

I'm feeling... actually a bit aggravated. yesterday, I slept through my alarm. Missed weigh in and Thursday morning workout. I weighed later in the day and gained some. I feel... defeated.

Next week's Goal: Eat only things God made. Drink 80 oz water daily, 8 workouts including 7 hours of cardio

It's Important to me because: My diet is my downfall. I am discouraged. I need a breakthrough

What I need to succeed: just do it already

Thursday Thoughts on.... Psalm 1:3

Iz and I shared our Time With God the other night. I did this for her, but turns out I needed it for myself. We were supposed to read Psalms chapters 1-5. I didn't get out of chapter 1. I got stuck on verse 3. This is how it reads....

That person is like a tree planted by streams of water,

    which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither—

    whatever they do prospers.

Wait, let me go back... verses 1 and 2 tell us who "that person" is... and who he/she isn't....

Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked,

nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers;

2 but his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night.

Okay so the person whose delight is in the law of the Lord and who meditates on it day and night....

THAT person is like a tree planted by streams of water...

THAT person  is like a tree that yields fruit in its season...

THAT person is like a tree whose leaf does not wither...

THAT person prospers.

I have a hydrangea in my front flower bed. Lately, it has been a bit droopy. The summer heat makes it want more water, and I am not faithful to consistently give it the water it needs. Poor thing has a tendency to get droopy, limp, pale... and then it rains. Over the past week, we have had a nice steady rain and my hydrangea LOVED it. This morning I noticed that she is bright green and standing tall.

This gives me a great visual of the tree mentioned in these verses. When we are separated from Christ (the "stream'), we are droopy, limp, pale, sickly.. we don't thrive. In contrast, when we are saturated with Christ, mediating on God's Word, focused on the Holy Spirit and His workings in our lives, we are robust, we stand tall, we have everything we need.

Thinking about the promise that "That person" will bear fruit in his/her time...

Trees yield fruit in their season... apple trees give us apples in the fall, after they survive the scorching heat of summer. They do not produce fruit continuously. This reminds me that I won't bear fruit continuously. There are seasons when I will bear fruit and seasons when I won't... but when I am "planted by streams of  water" ... rooted in the Holy Spirit... I will bear fruit when it's "my season." I wonder if we too bear our sweetest fruit after a "summer" of fiery trials.

Thinking about the promise that "That person" is like a leaf that does not wither...

I have a propensity for killing house plants, so I know a lot about withered leaves. They are crunchy, brittle, and crumble at the slightest touch. They fall away from the rest of the plant. (like those who are not close to Christ fall away from the church body.... but that's a post for another day)  I also know what that FEELS like... when I am not rooted in Christ, I FEEL brittle. I crumble and fall apart at the slightest thing. My emotions are fragile. I'm easily offended. In contrast, when a leaf is hydrated, it can withstand much harsher treatment...instead of crumbling, it only bruises. Same with me...

Finally, why would being close to Christ cause us to prosper? How can God promise this?  

When we are rooted in Christ, when we DELIGHT in the Law of the Lord, when we MEDITATE on it... our hearts align with His, our desires align with His, His plan becomes our plan, and so... we prosper. 

Just my thoughts.

K

Tuesday Tips and Tricks - Beat the Heat

It's July... and it's HOT.
This month I'll be sharing ways (some practical, some fun) to combat the heat.

1. Take a cool bath. Get used to the temp and then add more cold water. Keep doing this until you are sufficiently cold. This is especially helpful before trying to go to sleep at night.

2. Wear light colors - they reflect light and heat. Also, opt for sandals or flip flops when possible as the feet are areas of the body that tend to overheat.

3. Soak your feet in cold water infused with peppermint oil. The body radiates heat from the hands, feet, ears, and face so cooling any of  these areas will efficiently cool the body. Peppermint boosts the effect and smells great too.

Get Fit Friday

This Week's Goal: I didn't have one

Did I meet it? LOL I guess I did by default.

Biggest Accomplishment: getting back in the gym yesterday

I'm feeling... like I need to give myself a break.

Next week's Goal: be realistic; 6 workouts, 80 oz water, take lunch to work

It's Important to me because: Something happens when I start something and have some success.  I get into this mindset that nothing is enough.  I'm all for setting goals, but I think I need to learn how to set realistic ones.  Goodness.... how many times have I said that? 

What I need to succeed: Relax. Enjoy the journey. Stop being so hard on myself.  Work hard, meet goals and then accept and appreciate successes as they come.

Thursdays Thoughts on... being alone

Well, I've learned one very important thing these past 2 weeks.

I do not do well when I am alone...and I've been alone for the better part of the last 2 weeks.

I haven't slept. I can't eat. I'm just a mess. I mean... more of a mess than usual.

I missed the gym most days because... well, it's hard enough when I DO sleep... almost impossible when I don't.

It's not just the gym. I mean, that is the most noticeable thing, but it isn't the only thing that was off this week. I was paralyzed emotionally. I didn't want to do anything but stay in my house. I know that feeling so well. It's awful. So awful.

Spending time alone sounds like such a good idea. Peace and quiet. No one needing my attention. No one needing my time. No one telling me what to do. Sounds good.

It stinks.

I don't know what we will do going forward, but safe to say I won't be staying by myself for 10+ days again. This was a struggle.

Anyway, my people are home and so things will get back to normal soon.

And unlike 2 years ago, I won this battle.

Big Hugs!
K

Tuesday Tips and tricks - Beat the heat

It's July... and it's HOT.
This month I'll be sharing ways (some practical, some fun) to combat the heat.

1. The hottest part of the day is between 10 am and 4 pm. Plan outdoor activities around these times if possible.

2. SUNSCREEN! Not only is a sunburn unhealthy, it makes you feel hot.

3. Know the signs of heat exhaustion:

• Throbbing headache
• Dizziness
• Weakness
• Cool, Clammy skin
• Muscle Cramps
• Nausea
• Turning Pale
• Disorientation or confusion
• Fast Breathing
• Fainting

Monday Motivation

Tuesday Tips and Tricks - Beat the heat

It's July... and it's HOT.
This month I'll be sharing ways (some practical, some fun) to combat the heat.

1. Drink more water

2. Close the windows ans use insulated drapes to keep the sun out during the day and then open them at night when the sun goes down.

3. Cool the car off quickly... Roll down the window on one side; Open the door on the opposite side and fan it (open/close) about 5 times. This circulates the air by drawing the hot air out and replacing it with cooler air from outside.  (yes this even works when it is 101 outside... because it's probably 110 inside the car!)

4. Know your body's cooling points. By placing ice (or anything cold) on your wrist, neck, behind your knees, in the bend of your elbow, etc., you'll cool down more quickly and effectively.

5. If you have a ceiling fan, run it counter clockwise for optimum cooling.

Monday Motivation

Get Fit Friday

This Week's Goal: gallon of water daily; no bread; no chips, candy, cakes or ice cream; NO PIZZA; no sweet tea; 4 extra workouts focused on weight training, with about 30 min low impact cardio. 

Did I meet it? Are you kidding me? WHAT WAS I THINKING???????? I didn't drink any sweet tea. I had no ice cream. I ate one little debbie cake (not worth it). I ate some sweet tart ropes - they weren't even that good. *sigh* I DID get in 4 extra workouts. ONE was focused on weight training. I did get in the extra 2 hours (four 30 min cardio session) of cardio in. I ate pizza...last night... 

Biggest Accomplishment: Gee, after that last paragraph, I don't even know. OH! WAIT! I DO know what my biggest accomplishment was! I can do FROG JUMPS! okay... they aren't pretty or even the least bit impressive. I look like I have concrete blocks for feet. I don't jump high or far. BUT I JUMP. Also, I can CONSISTENTLY grab my foot to do the quad stretch. My balance is even improving here! let's see...nope, that's about it.

I'm feeling... overwhelmed. anxious. frustrated.  I tried working out twice a day this week and it only left me exhausted and unable to do anything but workout and go to work. Turns out I was actually sick with a UTI. Went to the doctor yesterday and got some antibiotics so maybe I'll feel better next week. I don't know how people drink over a gallon of water a day. I feel like I'm worse off tan i was when I started. That HAS to be mental. I feel like I should be able to run better, faster, longer. I feel like the workouts should be easier. This week I couldn't even do one push up... HOW CAN THAT BE????

Next week's Goal: relax and trust the process like i did in the beginning. 80 oz water a day. NO PIZZA, no chips, no candy, cakes, or ice cream. Meal prep all lunches and snacks.

It's Important to me because: I HAVE to get my head back in this. 

What I need to succeed: Don't quit

Thursday thoughts on ...Sharing Imperfection

On occasion I've looked at my social media, trying be objective, and wondered if it accurately reflects who I am. It seems that so many only post things that are flattering, almost perfect. I don't try to project any certain image, just post things I like. The result is a pretty accurate, albeit incomplete, representation of who I am and what I'm about.

This blog is a better reflection of me. Here on ITB, I've always just word-vomited whatever was on my mind. Sometimes I think it reflects exactly who I want to be. Other times it is a glaring reminder of how far I have to go. This is not a complete picture of me, but its kinda "me" in general. I try to be transparent about the struggles I face, but I don't suppose it's possible to be completely honest or transparent. 

This week I toyed with not sharing the rest of my journey. It's hard to keep writing about how I'm not getting the results I want, how I'm trying something new (again) to try and get better results. It's embarassing to see others' successes on social media, people who talk about their workouts and show off their fabulous bodies when I am still struggling to get through a workout. It makes me wonder if I am sharing too much. Maybe I should wait and talk about it in hindsight. Then I remembered that I started writing for me... not for readers. I started writing because it helps me sort through things. I started writing so that I could look back and see the ways God worked different things out over time.  I started writing so that I could remember what it feels like when things are not going my way... so that I won't give up. I started writing because I hoped that looking back over my story, i would find hope and courage to move forward, no matter the battle before me. I started writing so that I would have a record of how God has grown me over the years. Sometimes others relate and that's just an added bonus.

I'll continue to be honest and vulnerable. I'll continue to not project a perfect image. I'll continue to share and work through my struggles as they present themselves.  Right now, the most obvious struggle I'm facing is this whole gym thing, so that's what I'll share for now. Of course, as always, this could change by next week.

This week has been a tiny bit better. I've cleaned up my diet and I've increased my water consumption again. Gotten more consistent sleep. I've added some extra workouts, and slept through my first boot camp too, because i was too tired from working out late at night and not getting enough sleep.  I am hoping that strengthening specific parts of my body will make things like running and jumping easier eventually. I'll go over this week's gym progress and failure tomorrow.

Just my thoughts...

K