Tuesday, April 7, 2009

4th surgery/ day 1

Sometimes it takes something really bad to make me realize how blessed I truly am. Now that I have said that, I am thinking of so many more things other than what I intended to get on "paper" tonight.
What I was going to write about is the simple fact that I truly feel completely normal after this surgery. It is amazing! No headache, no grogginess, no nausea, no crankiness, no pain to speak of- other than the expected sore throat. Really, it is like I did not even have surgery today! I am totally amazed! But, all things are relative and the LAST surgery included the neck dissection and THAT was bad...so, this is nothing compared to that.
Other things that I am grateful for today...
My over-the-top mom in law. I couldn't have a better one. That sweet lady will do absolutely anything for us. She kept my babies last night and stayed with me this afternoon and is spending the night here tonight. I am sure she will stay with me tomorrow if we ask her to. She is completely selfless. I have never met anyone else like her. It is no wonder Calvin is so amazing. He has a GREAT mom.
Calvin is the other "thing" that is a true blessing to me. That poor man has been through it with me the past several months. He takes every step down this road that I do and patiently watches as God grows my faith. I am sure that there are times he wants to shake some sense to me, but he is patient, loving, understanding, and completely devoted. I could not have a better husband.
My Brian is my gift from God. What I did to earn enough favor with God for Him to entrust that precious boy to me escapes me. Brian is going to do HUGE things for God. He is wise beyond his years. I love to watch him grow in his relationship with his creator. The 10 year old smart mouth, I could do without, but I remember being worse to my mom than he is to me!
Little Izzy is like a ray of sunshine in our lives. She brightens my every day with her outlook on life. She is fearless and does everything full speed. She is independent and brave. She is just one cool little girl. She has brought spunk and excitement to our lives.
God has given me the BEST friends. I have not had a close group of friends in years, but over the past few years, God has blessed me with godly women who are willing to overlook (or point out when needed) my many flaws and make the sacrifices necessary to be my friends. You know who you are and I want you to know that I absolutely could not make it through life without you. You are a blessing to me in more ways than you can ever know.
As thankful as I am for all of these people and relationships, the one relationship that makes every day worth living is my relationship with Christ. He is my savior. My Savior! He loves me despite my thoughts, fears, angry outbursts, doubts, frustrations.... He loves me in spite of myself.
When I think of all the blessings of this life, I am instantly reminded of the greatest blessing i have received. Christ dying for me ad reserving my place with HIM in heaven is the blessing that will never be "trumped". Compared to salvation, all the wonder of this life is...well, nothing.
So, at this stage of the road, my surgery is behind me, and the pathology results are around the next curve, I am at peace only because I know who planned out my life. I know who calls me His Precious daughter. I know that God is in control of this and that he has already sacrificed Himself for me...so that I can spend eternity with Him....I can do nothing less than give Him everything I have until then.