I am writing this on February 1. Today is my mama's birthday.
Iz and I called her on our way to school and left the "happy birthday" song on her voicemail at work.
As we sang, something I've been trying to ignore became painfully obvious.
There is something wrong with my voice. I'm going to call Dr. Schweinfurth and schedule an appointment. It usually takes a month to get in to see him and I will probably be all better by then, but it will ease my mind to have him tell me that all is well. It is too easy to panic when my voice acts up. It is too easy to let my mind wander... to go down that path of "What ifs."
Thing is, there is absolutely the most minimal chance possible of my cancer returning a 3rd time. (I mean really, ya know?)
I know that I will have difficulty with my voice from time to time. My cords are damaged from cancer and from all we did to get rid of it. Logic tells me that the trouble I am having with my voice now is only the result of all that damage.
I know that I will have difficulty with my voice from time to time. My cords are damaged from cancer and from all we did to get rid of it. Logic tells me that the trouble I am having with my voice now is only the result of all that damage.
I'm sure that this is just another something to distract me from what I want to be doing... moving on with my life and enjoying it. I'm not going to let the "what ifs" get the best of me. Just going to make an appointment with Doc and see what he says.
Will update on this little drama after I see Doc. Hoping that by posting this 7 weeks out, I can follow up with my visit with doc next week. We'll see.
Much love and big hugs!
K
Update:
I actually got in to see Dr. Schweinfurth shortly after I initially wrote this post. He assured me that my hoarseness was due to atrophy in my "bad" chord.
On March 12, Doc injected Collagen (or something like that) into my bad chord to "plump it up." He said that my voice "will sound like hell for about 3 weeks," so I am doing my best to be patient and just wait for everything to heal.
People have asked if this is something I will have to do again. Doc said that I will and that it could be necessary as frequently as every year or as infrequently as every 5 years.
I have a post surgery follow up in April.
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